‘Consent, accountability’: What educator Tanisha Rao wants to be taught better during sex education
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You’re Somebody’s Kink by Tanisha Rao does not try to be a manual; it says so in the very first line of the book. What it does, instead, is share stories about everyday people in their everyday pursuits, and encourage readers to empathise with the subjects’ unique journeys in intimacy and in life. It does so quite successfully, showcasing a range of narratives about a range of people who find themselves defying the mores of monogamous, cis-normative, hetero-normative intimacy that society imposes on all of us, and that leave so many of us feeling like we’re broken in some way for not fitting into it.
Rao’s writing is approachable and lucid, despite a tendency to use many, many adverbs. Her authorial voice remains largely in the background as large portions of the text are centred on the voice of her interviewees. Only in the Introduction and conclusion does her own perspective emerge. In many ways, these are the most compelling parts of the book as she writes them with an authority that makes the book feel more personal and more urgent in its purpose. They’re also the parts where Rao’s craft as a writer shines.
Excerpts from an interview with Scroll:
Where did you get the idea for...