How to Talk to Your Child About the Cybertruck’s Demise
· The Atlantic
Sit down with your child in a quiet place. He or she may have many questions, such as, “Those big silver trucks that looked like a kid drew them, they are not making them anymore?” and “But if there are no Cybertrucks anymore, how will I know whom not to date when I grow up?”
Be warm and calm. Explain that the trucks were in pain, and had been in pain for a long time, because their bodies were not properly designed for the job they were doing. Explain that they are not going to a farm upstate, because they would be unable to deal with the terrain there.
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Explain that, yes, these were supposed to be the trucks of the future. But then people took a look at that future and said, “No. Bring us another future, please.”
Use short words, pausing frequently. Sometimes basic concepts can be difficult to grasp, especially if you have a strong, incorrect idea in your head already. This unfortunate fact explains much of the design of the Cybertruck.
A simple script can be best. Say something like, A truck is a special kind of vehicle for carrying large loads. Some trucks are big rigs. Some trucks are tow trucks. Some trucks are abominations in the eyes of God and Man and should never have been brought into existence. This truck was the third kind of truck, and people didn’t like that.
I know the car looked cool, like a refrigerator that was trying to puff itself up to intimidate a predator. But people prefer it when their wheels don’t fall off. Actually, it is not “normal” or “cool” for the wheels to fall off, and anyone who tries to tell you otherwise is mistaken.
No, not all trucks like to drink gasoline. That was not what was wrong with the truck. What was wrong with the truck was everything else.
If you want to, take time to explain. Usually, stainless steel does not rust. Usually, a truck’s doors respond to your commands. Usually, trucks have brakes that work.
Explain that the Cybertruck would be driving off into the sunset, but its wheels have fallen off, so it will sit there into the sunset instead. Explain that you don’t know what the Cybercab is either, and it is okay not to know. Tell your child not to worry. All of the other Monster Trucks are still okay.
And if your child asks, “Was the truck bad?” Be honest. Say yes.